Quick Update...

Hey Everyone! I hope my last blog didn't freak anyone out. I'm doing very well! I have a dr appt on Tuesday to talk about my anxiety and see what I can do. It's weird how it comes and goes...it's on a "goes" for now, which is good! The girls are up at my parents tonight for the night, what a nice break! I just finished up a calendar page I was sooo excited about, so I am here to share real quick before I pass out from exhaustion! lol

So yesterday I went on a little bit ( more like too much) of a scrapping buying moment.  I bought several new kits and stuff.  So...I found some great new places to add to my favorites. 

First, designerdigitals.com (thanks to Tamara *wink*) And I got among what I got there was the Apple Dumpling kit which I used on this page.  Then last night I found heatheranndesigns.com and found the greatest thing that made me soooo happy!  I am working on the girls' first year albums in digital, and I couldn't find a decent calendar layout or template or anything that was what I wanted, other than current years, maybe dating back to 2006.  I need 2002 and 2004.  Then I came across the amazing monthly memories kit and I.LOVE.IT!  So I played with it last night and finished this tonight.  I might play around with this page a little more, but i think it is sooo cute!  I am trying to focus on getting Jenica's book done before Kaitlyn's (just because she's older) but I had this cute idea to use my last belly shot...so I did Kaitlyn's first month here instead.  I will do a calendar page for each month for each girls' first year!  And I can't begin to tell you how much fun it was to play around with!!

I have so much more to share, but I am beat!  I had to drive the girls to my parents in Bountiful and then I have to drive back tomorrow after church to pick them up.  Not looking forward to that 2 hour round trip drive, but hopefully Josh will come with me this time!  Earlier today my neighbor took some pics of the girls in their Christmas dresses!  There are some very cute pics...I will try to put them up tomorrow!!  Good Night!

bad night

Last night was horrible. I have a problem telling short stories, but I will try to keep this one as short as possible. A couple nights ago I saw on the news that an older couple died in their home from carbon monoxide poisoning. It put thoughts into my head, like my anxiety does and I couldn't let it go. I started feeling sick and just off...and I was convinced I was going to die. So last night Josh was at work late, I had the kids in bed and I started panicking. It was about 9:30. So I called my mom and had several small attacks come on, and my mom helped me get my mind off of them. I talked to her for about an hour and then called Josh to see if he was coming home yet because I really needed him. He was on his way in a few minutes. So I called my mom back and talked to her for another hour while I waited for him to get him. It was just such a scary night for me, I don't know why I have this problem sometimes, but it just sucks. I took some nyquil and then I really started to feel funny. I kept feeling like I was going to pass out. It was really nice to talk to my mom for 2 hours about totally random stuff, and she got an idea of what I suffer with on a daily basis. I won't go into detail about all of my fears...but she said she's surprised that I can even leave my house. I was pretty anxious as a child, and it seemed to have gotten better, but has been getting worse ever since kaitlyn was born.

I slept great after Josh was home. He was great. He put the clothes in the dryer for me so Jenica would have something to wear to school today, this morning the alarm went off at 5:20, I didn't even hear it, and I slept until 7. I asked him to get Jenica up and he did. He got her up, dressed, fed, did her hair, and took her to school. I didn't wake up until 10, when Kaitlyn was playing with my phone and called Josh, he reminded me to pick Jeni up. I'm so bored, the bulb in the tv blew, so it's not like I can relax on the couch and watch tv even. I can relax on the couch and do nothing. Maybe I'll sleep. I am watching my little sister in law today until about 2/2:30 while my mil is at work. After I picked the girls up from school we went and grabbed a pizza and then went and got a movie from the redbox. They are downstairs watching a movie and eating pizza so I can relax. So far so good. Today is our activity days christmas party, combined with the 2 groups, but I don't think I am going to make it. I think I am getting the flu...right now the worst of it is the body aches, and my head feeling all funny.

Ok, I have rampbled enough...:) I'm going to lay on the couch...and hopefully fall asleep!

Party Time!!

Oh tonight was so much fun! I already cannot wait until the Christmas party next year...a year to go...!! hehe 

The evening started a little rocky...hors d'oeuvres started at 5:45, we didn't leave the house until 5:30...and we had a good drive ahead of us, especially considering it was snowing like crazy.  I was sad we were going to miss them because we missed them last year also...6:15 was a welcome and 6:30 was dinner.  We arrived at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building at 6:15...but go figure, the lot was full, so we drove another 3 blocks or so and parked at a hotel where they accepted validation from the JSMB.  Luckily the snow had stopped, but it was freezing and we were so late.  We walked as fast as we could through the sea of people downtown to see the christmas lights and we hopped on the elevator up to the 9th floor and walked in right at 6:30.  We ended up sitting at the same table as Dan, Josh's boss.  It was good.  The food was great.  Some delicious salads, prime rib, turkey, twice baked potatoes, rolls, and dessert.  After dinner was done they did some gifts to and speeches from people with anniversaries with the company.  One lady was there 10 years, 4 guys from 15 years, and Josh's boss for 20 years.  They did a few drawings for prizes, but we didn't win anything and then we headed for costco.

We were planning on just getting a Nintendo DS.  Our plan was destroyed, they were out.  We got $200 to spend this year, and I think we did pretty well, we came within 9 cents of our limit!!  That was pretty good!  Here's what we got:

-kitchenaid icecream attachment with 4 cute little ice cream bowls

-tillamook extra sharp white cheddar 2# brick

-a new clock to hang in the kitchen that was bigger than the one that we currently had up there, it's a satellite one so it always stays set

-josh got a big fancy airplane book

-2 games for the DS that we will have to buy somewhere else.

-a dvd of 13 of the Pixar Short Films.  I am way excited to watch it!!

-Rachael Ray "just in time!" cookbook

-another cookbook "deceptively delicious" (simple secrets to get your kids eating good food)

I say we did pretty well considering we didn't have a plan this year, just like last year.  And I probably wasted the first 10 minutes running around looking for a stupid hidden bow to win a present, which I never found.  30 minutes really isn't very long.  We were down to $18.18 left to spend and you can't go over...then I found the Pixar Shorts for $18.09 and right when I grabbed it the horn blew and it was over.  I was so excited!  The cashier was pretty impressed.  After we checked out we hung out and talked to Josh's boss for a little bit and then headed home.  I'm excited to look through my new cookbooks, I have a menu to make for the next couple weeks so I hope I find some good stuff!!  Good Night!

pretty bad thursday!

I don't think any more bad things could have happened to me in one day...am I wrong?  All I can do now is look back and laugh.  Tell me if you agree...

The morning actually started out great...got up at 5:20 and went to the gym...I missed tuesday and wednesday due to Josh getting home really really late (i'm talking like 4 am) from work or helping his brother (depends on the night).  I knew he wasn't going to wake up at 7 to get Jenica up, so I skipped the gym and stayed home so I could get her ready myself.  It was fine.  But when I don't go (which luckily has only been 3 days out of the past 6 weeks) I feel like something is missing from my day.  It's such a great way to start the day!  There's another girl that goes in, her name is Wendy and we'll usually do cardio on our own and then Jared will train us both together.  So yesterday Jared was helping someone else and we had finished the exercises he told us to do, so we sat and playing catch with a 10  lb medicine ball.  It was fun...we goof off and act like dorks.  I've only known her as long as I have been going this time around.  It's pretty lonely on the days she doesn't come in.  Anyways, I made it home and Jenica was actually awake...I got her out the door to school and thought about running up to target to have some vitamins refilled.  I decided to wait until I picked Jeni up and take her along.

At 10 I went to the school to work in the at home reading program book exchange thing.  I was there until 10:45 when school gets out.  I went to get Jenica and my friend asked me to watch her daughter so she could finish her christmas shopping.  This is the friend I babysit for all the time anyways.  I was fine with that, I would just run to Target later.  So after I watched her she took Jenica home with her while I ran out.  

-While I was babysitting, I went into the basement, my toes got stuck in a blanket and I tripped and landed on them all funny and it felt like I broke all my little toes on my left foot.

-I went to Target AND Walmart, and got nothing.  Not one thing.  I had a couple things in mind, like maybe some rollerskates of some sort for kaitlyn since I have some for Jenica for christmas.  Nothing at Target...so I tried walmart...nothing at all there either.  So I wanted to see if they had any of the new baby alive accessory sets.  They had stacks of them on the top of the shelf, but I couldn't reach clear up there.  So I find a guy and ask him to help me.  He told me he was already busy helping someone else and to find someone else to help me.  I seriously walked around for 20 minutes and couldn't find anyone.  So we left.

-We stopped at Smith's on the way home to get stuff to make spinach dip to take to a christmas party last night.   Everything was good until we went to check out and kaitlyn disappeared.  I was looking/yelling for her, couldn't find her.  It wasn't like her to walk off.  She's never done that before.  Jeni on the other hand...well that's another story.  So I go up to the front and they don't have a plan for missing kids like target or walmart or anywhere else have.  So the lady announces there is a missing child over the speaker and all these people start helping us look for her.  I was freaking out.  I didn't leave the front because I wanted to keep my eye on the door so no one could walk out with her.  She was finally found back in the christmas section looking at stuff.  What a relief.  That scared me so bad.  

-After I picked Jenica up and made the spinach dip I was chillin on the couch in the front room.  I think I was on the phone with my mom.  Jenica ran and jumped on me and her knee hit into my forearm.  It hurt sooo bad.  I said "Ooouch...I think you just broke my arm."  Jeni picked it up, looked at it for a minute before putting it down and said "it looks ok to me, you'll be alright".  :)  It was cute.

-The party we were going to started at 7, I bribed my brother in law to watch the girls, but one of the requirements was that they were in bed.  So I started bedtime at 6:30.  It was nuts.  Josh got home at about 7:20 and we walked over to get James to come chill at our house.  (the girls went right to bed as soon as he got here).  We were walking back across the street...it was raining...I went to jump over the curb and run across the street...which resulted in me face planting it into the road,  where I laid crying in pain.  Josh stood there and said "what are you doing?"  lol  Oh, I thought i would just take a little rest in the wet road on the walk back across the street.  

-I went and changed my pants because my khaki's were all dirty and wet now.  I noticed that an ugly visitor had reared it's head giving me the confirmation that I am not pregnant.  I think that was the hardest part of the day.  I could handle everything else, but that was hard.  This was our first month trying since I had my miscarriage back in august, so I was really hoping!  Really really really.  It's never been a problem before, so hopefully it doesn't take too long.  Anyways, the Jeans I put on (the only nice un-hole-y ones I have) are pretty loose on me.  This leads to the next bad thing...and thankfully the last:

-the party was a lot of fun.  i am so glad we went.  When we got home Josh informed me that during one of the games I was kneeling on the floor and my "coinslot" was hanging out.  That's his word for butt crack...he got it from an episode of SNL a while back.  I told him I wanted to cry, that was so embarrassing...he said that only the people behind me saw.  Wonderful...so him, his parents, and another lady in the ward.  Aghh.  

I had a little bit of a breakdown last night and called my mom bawling.  But I feel much much better now and life is good again.  It was fun to share all my mis-haps with my gym friends this morning.  We had a good laugh.

Alright, Josh just informed me that I am writing a novel.  I don't even have any fun pictures to share, at least not at the moment.  I forgot the camera in the car.  Tomorrow is the BIG christmas party for Josh's work.  It'll be a blast.  Fancy dinner at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building and then Costco shopping spree.  Woohoo!  I'll be sure to get some pictures.  I plan on looking pretty snazzy...lol.  Sorry so long, thanks for reading.